From Conflict to Connection

Identify the specific patterns that predict whether a relationship will recover or continue declining, including ones that have likely been active in your relationship for years, and what it takes to interrupt them.

Curriculum

12 Chapters · 164 Lessons

    1. (Included in full purchase)

      The Rules for Success

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      How to Complete the Assignments

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      Expectations

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      Each Level for a Different Goal

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      You Cannot Pick the Right Tool for the Wrong Job

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      Your 90-Day Relationship Plan

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      How to Measure Your Progress: The Recovery Log

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      Disclaimer and Safety

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      Roadmap: Decide if You're In or if You're Out

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      When Only One of You Is Here

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      The Gap Between Being In or Out

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      What's Playing on Your Partner's Highlight Reel?

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      The Fork in the Road That Predicts Everything

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      Commitment Lives in the Tiny Moments

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      The Most Dangerous Sentence in a Relationship

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      Alice Didn't Wait for a Better Rabbit

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      Why Skills Won't Save a Divided Relationship

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      Choosing, Again, Today

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      The Kitchen Table, Twice

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Commitment Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Pause the Conversation When it Gets too Heated

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      Zero to Sixty at the Kitchen Table

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      Your Body Knows the Future

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      The Car Crash in Your Living Room

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      Know Your Number

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      Three Faces, One Thief

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      The Slow Erosion Nobody Notices

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      How to Take a Break Without Breaking Trust

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      When Your Partner Can't Hear You Yet

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      What to Do While You're Gone

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      When Real Life Doesn't Give You Thirty Minutes

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Flooding Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Keep Disagreements Calm During the First Three Minutes

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      The Three Minutes That Decide Everything

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      What Harsh Startup Actually Looks Like

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      Why Harsh Startup Feels So Righteous

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      The Anatomy of Gentle Startup

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      Gentle Is Not Weak

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      The Same Fight, Twice

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      The Skills You Already Have

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      Training Each Other's Startups

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      How to Practice When It Matters Most

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      The Long Shadow of Three Minutes

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Harsh Startup Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Eliminate Contempt From Your Conversations

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      The Half Second That Predicts the End

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      "We Don't Do That": The Contempt You Can't See in Yourself

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      The Faces Contempt Wears on Purpose

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      What Contempt Costs: The Marriage and the Body

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      Where Contempt Actually Starts (Almost Never With Your Partner)

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      The Solution: Speaking From Your Heart Instead of Your Throne

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      Building a Climate Where Contempt Can't Survive

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      When Appreciation Doesn't Land

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      Catching It Before It Leaves Your Mouth

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      When Contempt Is Aimed at You (and When It's Everywhere)

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Contempt Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Know Which Problem You’re Solving

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      The Fight You Already Know by Heart

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      Sixty-Nine Percent of Your Problems Aren't Going Anywhere

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      The Day the Room Went Cold

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      The Tip of the Iceberg

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      Watch Gridlock Eat a Conversation

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      The Same Fight, Run Differently

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      Pick Your Problem. Yes, Just One.

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      How to Hold a Conversation That Used to Explode

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      Five Repairs That Catch You Mid-Fall

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      What Changes When Nothing Changes

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Gridlock Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss with Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Use Complaints, Not Criticism

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      The Sentence That Ends the Conversation Before It Starts

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      The Two Sentences That Sound Almost the Same

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      There Is No Such Thing As Constructive Criticism

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      The Door Criticism Opens

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      Where Your Criticism Learned to Talk

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      It Lives In the Listener's Ear

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      The Tool You Already Have

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      When You Didn't Mean It

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      Naming the Pattern Without Starting a New One

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      What You're Really Asking For

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Criticism Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Take Responsibility Rather Than Being Defensive

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      The Weapon of Mass Destruction

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      What Your Body Knows Before Your Brain Does

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      The Two Disguises Defensiveness Wears

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      The Message Underneath the Words

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      Why It Feels So Justified From the Inside

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      The Antidote and the Two-Beat Pause

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      What Taking Responsibility Actually Sounds Like

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      When You're the One Who Never Throws the First Ball

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      After the Shield Drops

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      The Long Game: Building a Defense-Optional Culture

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Defensiveness Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Stay Reachable Instead of Shutting Down

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      What Shutting Down Actually Looks Like

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      The Signals That Go Quiet

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      The Statue That's Sprinting

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      Not Indifference. Overload.

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      Why This Lands Harder for Some People

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      The Line Between Tense and Flooded

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      The Spiral That Feeds Itself

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      Using Your Words Before You Disappear

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      Coming Back Into the Room

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      The Relationship on the Other Side

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Shutting Down Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Repair Quickly When the Conversation Goes Sideways

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      The Myth of Perfect Connection

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      The Five Seconds That Decide Everything

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      What Successful Couples Do That Others Never Learn

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      The Repair Toolkit That Feels Fake Until It Doesn't

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      The Emergency Repair Toolkit

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      Six Ways to Throw Your Partner a Rope

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      Why the Approach You Use at Work Can Kill Your Relationship

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      The One Sentence That Ends Most Fights

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      Why Some Repairs Never Land

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      The Repair That Undoes Itself

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      Practice Now, Not During the Storm

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Repair Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      Roadmap: Give Your Partner the Benefit of the Doubt

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      Seven Words, Two Different Fights

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      The Half You Never See

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      Your Body Already Knows

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      The Story You Tell About Each of You

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      Why Gratitude Journals Don't Fix This

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      You're Further Along Than You Think

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      What Changes When the Lens Clears

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      Why "What's Wrong?" Isn't Always Innocent

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      The Clock You Didn't Choose

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      The Day It's Just Recycling Again

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      Frequently Asked Questions

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      Negative Lens Tactical Analysis

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      Discuss With Your Partner

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      Reflection Form

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      How Your New Skills Work Together

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      Check Your Knowledge

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      Check Yourself for Any Blind Spots

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      The Recovery Log

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      So, What Now?